10 smirks

As part of my time-wasting activities, I have decided to make a list of ten teeny little things that make me smile and smirk to myself. Ten is an arbitrary number.

1. dogs that howl with sirens because there is some irrepressible instinct to howl along with things at those frequencies. or else, they think that the siren is a hot male dog. anyway, it makes me smile, as if they were doing it just for me.

2. having cozy banter with strangers in different situations: waiting for an elevator, or in the ladies' room, or with the loading dude at the dock, for a few examples.

3. finally finishing the paperwork.

4. old friends or frenemies who still want to hang around me.

5. jelly beans and peanut m&ms. it's inexplicable.

6. the end of a yeast infection. i doubt there is ever nothing that feels as good.

7. having a blog where I can add "yeast infection" to a list and readers be darned. like a sock.

8. listening to quebecois "jaser" and "sacrer". le petit crisse d'un bonhomme! mon espece de rat. it's like in those stupid romantic comedies when the woman goes off on a screaming binge and the man comes over and gazes at her admiringly and says, 'you're beautiful when you're angry," and then she just melts like dogshit on a summer day. I finally understand what the man is getting at - they're so funny when they slangify and swear, just like she's beautiful when she's angry.
sideline: those men are silly. they think she's beautiful because she's being passionate, but usually the only thing that really gets her passion up is the latest stupid thing he's done!! haha... bunch of losers.

9. kissing my middle finger at glaring americans on the interstate.

10. getting to the end of an arbitrary ten-point list.

b. adding an extra demi-point to a complete list.

c. having someone say to me, 'and do you regret that?' and punching them in the nose with the answer NO! well, it depends how they act and how stupid I think the question is. and whether or not i regret the thing.