stretch, streak and roam

my mind is buzzing with good conversation and fun times. I have so much I want to express, but I will need to think a moment before I write it down.

I am so glad to have girlfriends. they are so important in the life of a woman. there is a sort of timeless, lifelong bond between women that surpasses a woman's relationships with men - even if you have the good fortune to be in one of those great relationships. don't misunderstand - I like men. a lot. but they are men. just like I can't fathom what it would be like to be a man with the dingly-dangly, they cannot understand the idea of womanhood. I'm not one of those people, usually, who says, "oh, you can't understand, you're not [fill in the blank]." Or maybe I am. But I've also been frustrated when someone tells me that I can't understand for the same reason. Like my good friends in Quebec who still long for sovereignty. I don't understand it. Yes, it is deplorable the way English Canada tried to undermine the Quebec language and way of life. But I like Canada and it is my nightmare to separate Quebec from Canada. Canada is less without Quebec and I don't feel I can have any claim to the Quebec culture that I so admire and support if it is separate. I am sad when they tell me I can't understand because I am anglophone, but they are probably right (about me understanding, not about quebec seceding). I guess, too, that they cannot fully understand my grief at the thought of it, nor my ancestral guilt.

woo. small detour. so I think men basically cannot understand us completely. our fellow women, though, can help us to see ourselves more fully. at times we resent "that kind of woman" but then later we have to admit that maybe we are "that kind of woman" sometimes in some ways. we find strength in our collective and shared weaknesses. god this sounds so corny.

what a strange combination of words: our fellow women. haha. that just struck me. because sisterhood is different from brotherhood, there must be a female idea of fellowship. I am not a fellow. it must be annoying for francophone atheist feminists to talk about the weather... "he makes cold, he makes sunshiny". to always be referencing some male deity. that would piss me off. unless "il" refers not to god like I thought, but rather the sky [le ciel]. interesting.

this is me puzzling over the gendered language that we use in our two official languages. right you guys? haha. night.